Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Stone walls

Good morning!

Here it is a beautiful Monday morning, and I am finally sitting down to write. You are probably wondering why you haven’t heard from me lately, but it has been quite a year. It started out with major surgery, followed by 2 college classes that started the next day, an awful toothache, that led to half of a root canal, oral surgery to remove a piece of bone in my jaw, a wisdom tooth pulled, and the other half of the root canal and a crown still to come. When I sat down to read, this verse just jumped out at me, because it felt so much like the first three months of the year…

“So many enemies against one man- all of them trying to kill me. To them I’m just a broken down wall or a tottering fence.” Ps. 62:2

I know many of you have also been feeling “under attack” lately, with health issues or circumstances that seem to come one after the other, so maybe you can relate as well. Maybe you are feeling like that tottering fence.

“I wait quietly before God, for my victory comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will never be shaken.” Ps. 62:1

This morning, as Scott and I were walking, I noticed the stone walls in the state forest, walls built about 200 years ago. They are still as solid as the day they were built. It was a reminder to me that our lives are built upon the rock, the fortress where we will never be shaken loose from His love and care. We’re not the tottering fence, here for a season then rotting away. What God is doing in us is even more enduring than these New England stone walls.

“Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.” Ps. 62:5,6

I can’t say I understand why I have gone through all of this, but I sense with the changing of the seasons a fresh start, and a new sense of “all that I am waiting quietly before God” to see what this season will bring. In childbirth, transition is the most difficult and painful time. As the season change in our spiritual lives, doesn’t it follow that these transitions will sometimes be difficult as well, until we learn to push with the contractions and cooperate with what God is trying to birth in us?

“My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust in Him at all times. Pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge.” Ps. 62:7,8

There are times when we are feeling shaky but He will be our strength. The Psalmist, knowing we are human, tells us to pour out our hearts to Him, all our cares and concerns, our hopes and fears, and come to Him for refuge in the midst of the battle. He tells us to trust Him at ALL TIMES, remembering that God has a plan for us, a plan for victory and honor.

I have spent quite a while struggling with the WHY, and don’t have the answer. But I am learning to turn to the WHO and starting to see Him shape the “all that I am” and all that He wants me to be. I know this is a season of change in my life (not just the menopause that I got thrown into with surgery) but in all areas. I’m seeing changes in my marriage, my attitudes, and the possibilities for the future. This often difficult time of rototilling in my life is preparing the soil of my heart for what is to come, my own personal victory garden in the hands of the Master Gardener. His fruit is always good.

May the soil of our hearts bring forth fruit a hundredfold, all for His glory.
With love and prayers, Cheryl 4/14/08

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